Expression

 I loved Building Blocks as a kid.Loved to put those pieces together and create something big.I recall as a 4 year old in kindergarten, we had these short breaks wherein us kids were allowed to go to the back corner of the room to play with few toys which were categorically arranged into various boxes.'Building blocks' was one such box.Each time the bell rang ,these boys who were quicker and faster used to run towards this box,grab those blocks and begin their own construction. I never could make it to the box on time.I was so shy that I could not even muster enough courage to join those boys or to wriggle my way into the huddle to get my chunk of the  blocks.I used to stand and watch ,hoping one of them would call me to join them...half hour of the break would just be about me staring at the group and desperately hoping that I would get invited as I so wanted to play.One day i decided that I had to play with those blocks at any cost .I had to build that house.My method to do so is what defined me for a large part of my life.

So one day as the bell rang post the break and we had to go back to our seats,I slowly got up from my back row seat ,walked towards the box ,opened it and started building my mansion,all alone.For a long time the teacher didnt even notice.But this gave me enough time to build a castle of my dreams,undisturbed.And then suddenly she noticed me sit there.She came over and hugged me..that long sympathetic hug,which meant , "o you poor boy,you should have asked me if you wanted to play".

This has been me for a large part of my life.Would others get angry?Would they feel bad?Would they laugh at me?Will they be friends ever if I ask?..my mind would play these questions in loop.

Not being able to express is the biggest suffocation one can feel.And like I missed my play time just waiting to be invited,there is a good chance that you let go of your entire lifetime ,just waiting for those chances to come knocking .And finally , like I did post the recess,once your time is over,you make that move ,only to draw more sympathy.

So if there is one lesson I would like my kids to take away from this is,time will come when u have to step up and ask,can I play...time could come when u need to ask a girl,would you go out with me...,time would come when you would have to tell your boss,I am done here...time would come when you would have to express your gratitude to your loved ones for this beautiful life....because if you miss expressing in those moments,time will also come when you are too late...and when you act then , all you would get would be that long sympathetic hug....and that's when you would feel that this whole life was a misunderstanding...